Saturday, February 27, 2010


Most days do not start out with a knock on the door with a random woman asking if my husband is home. Okay, so no day ever starts that way. Soon after telling her that he was working she told me she talked to him yesterday, she is from the funeral home. We had met with the funeral home earlier this month. The first visit was, much to my surprise, easier than I had expected. At the time we were not sure whether we would cremate or have a burial and we were just getting information for each.
I do believe that we are going to do a burial so the lady from the funeral home was dropping off brochures for infant headstones. Those are papers that no parent should have to look at. How do you pick out the "perfect" headstone for your baby? On one hand, it really does not matter, it is just her body that will be buried in the cemetery. It just needs to have the basic information on it but at the same time cost does not matter. We will never be able to buy her birthday or Christmas presents, never worry about providing a car when she turns 16 or even have to try to figure out how to help pay for college. All we can give our daughter is one outfit, a headstone and our love while she is still with us.
I'm going to call the city building Monday so that we can go look at plots at the city cemetery soon. As hard as this is now, I would much rather take care of all the details before delivering. We still have not decided on a memorial service. Part of me does not want to do it but another part of me hopes for closure by going through with it. We probably will have one, I do not think we would look back and regret having one but would not want to look back wishing that we had done one. There are so many decisions in this process that I would have never even considered.
I have a doctor appointment Tuesday and I am hoping to find out if I am dilated more. This week should be informative if nothing else!

1 comment:

  1. Hey girl, heard you had a blog going and just read through all of your posts ... through tears but I got them all read. Just wanted to let you know you,greg and your family are all in my thoughts and prayers!!! You are a strong woman!!