Sunday, January 13, 2013

This Community

Tonight I was moved to tears upon reading a post on Facebook.  Normally I skim through most, some emotional, some not and really not put much thought into them.  I skimmed past one posted by Sufficient Grace Ministries and did a double take, scrolled back up and began crying when I read this:

"Just receive another prayer request from a dear momma who lost her precious son and then had 3 miscarriages. She is currently expecting. Will you join us in lifting her in prayer and the sweet baby being knit together in her womb? Every precious life matters to God, and He hears our prayers for these moms and their little ones. Praying Psalm 139:13-14 for her: "For You formed my inward parts; You covered me in my mother’s womb.
I will praise You, for I am fearfully and wonderfully made". Please pray for comfort, strength, and peace for her and health for her and her sweet little one. Thank you...your prayers mean so much!!"

There have been many times that I have felt so blessed to have found such a wonderful community of women who share in the pain of childloss.  I found found a family of friends, most of whom I will never meet but still talk about them as if our kids have playdates together.  We have cried together, laughed together, celebrated new life while others have had to say goodbye to more of their babies.  Without this community, I know that I would not have been able to face many firsts.  The first time I held a newborn baby after losing Olivia, I came home and typed through tears and they understood.  When I became pregnant with Claire, those women were among the first to know.  All of the feelings, hurts, grief, frustrations, my heart was poured out to them and they truly understood.  I am forever thankful that we live in a time that has allowed me to connect with other women in this way.

Other times I hate it.  I genuinely wish that I would have never had to enter this world.  I have intentionally distanced myself from groups and blogs because it hurts.  Some days I just wish I could forget, not Olivia, but the emptiness of her not being here.  The sad reality of this is that it never ends.  I have reached a point where my good days far outnumber the bad but my God, what I wouldn't give to hold my baby one more time.  And for that, these groups are a constant reminder. 

Then I came across that post today and it reminded me of the beauty of this journey.  We, as people, can put our differences aside.  We surround each other with love, prayer and encouragement.  We can come together and pray for this woman and so many others that so badly want that "take home baby."  I don't know all of their stories or their struggles but I can connect to the pain.  Please pray tonight for these women who have endured so much suffering.  Pray that they will be blessed with that miracle of a perfect, healthy baby that can help heal their hearts. 

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