Where were you?

“Imagine a love so strong that saying hello and good-bye in the same day is worth all the sorrow.”

Where were you the day you were told your child would die? It sounds crazy but an unfortunate reality for many parents, some of which you might not even realize. If you have 3 or more children, imagine taking the 3rd child and completely erasing them from your family. The thought seems unimaginable. It sucks but we live with that every single day.

Most people have a significant event or day that defines who they are or how they continue their lives. December 11, 2009 was that day for us, D-Day (diagnosis day) in the baby loss community. Two years ago today, Greg and I woke up carefree parents, anticipating an ultrasound. We were going to see our little baby and confirm what we already knew, there was a life growing inside of me. We walked out of the doctor office completely changed. That little life growing inside of me changed how I viewed the world, my life and those around me. Every decision, every event and every milestone from that day on, somehow relates back to the instant we found out that our sweet baby was given a zero percent chance of survival.

There is nothing I would love more than to return to December 11, 2009 and change the outcome and view this as someone else's reality. I know I cannot do that. With that being said, I would walk this road all over again, just to have her as part of my life. Olivia's life is a constant reminder that this world is only temporary. Because of her I can look forward with anticipation, knowing the pain of this world is worth spending forever in His glory.